Life Lessons From my Child

The other day, my Brown-Eyed Boy said something to me that blew my mind, and I can’t stop thinking about it.

Brown-Eyed Boy with Brown-Eyed Aunt in 2001

A little back story:  His (younger) sister was razzing him about his blanket, telling him that he had to sell it when he was a grown-up.  My distraught little boy came up to me and asked if this is what he “had” to do.  (Mind you, she has a blanket, too, so this was totally a Pot vs. Kettle thing going on.)

My Brown Eyeds in 2003

I told him of course he didn’t *have* to do that, and that I would be more than happy to keep Blankey for him when he outgrows him, and never get rid of him. (Yes, my kids’ blankets have gender and are for all intents and purposes talked-about members of our family)


Wrong. Thing. To. Say.


He was almost in tears as he said he would never outgrow Blankey, so I quickly said that when he goes to college and has a family of his own, that I would keep Blankey, that way he would never be lost.


Then he asked if he could love on Blankey whenever he came to visit me when he was older.


{cue the sound of a mother’s heart breaking in two}


“Of course,” I say, “any time you want.”  Then he said the thing that I can’t stop thinking about.


He said this:  “I don’t care if people make fun of me for liking the things I like.  I like me and I like the way God made me.”

……………… Blown……. Completely…….. Away……………………

I still am.  Who in this world *doesn’t* want to be able to say and believe those words?!  “I like me and I like the way God made me.”

Just because they are adorable

This has made me think about self-esteem and what a hot topic it is in parenting these days.  Everyone, it seems, wants to make sure their kid has a “good” self esteem.  But what does that really mean?

It made me want to examine my own parenting style, and if this expression by my son was affirmation or condemnation of how and what I am teaching my kids.  So of course, I went to the Source.  The only thing I could find even remotely related to the concept of self-esteem (since there was no such word back then) was the verse in Matthew 22:39

“Love your neighbor as yourselves.”

The statement implies that we must know how to love ourselves if we are to love others in the same manner.  So self-love is an important part of a healthy self-esteem.

I believe that self-love can only come if you first know who you are.  Who you are is not the choices you make or have made, what others’ opinions of you are, or who you see when you look in the mirror.  Those things are ever-changing.

Who you are is your eternal soul that God knew before He wrapped skin around you and you became human.  You were created in the image of God!

God created human beings;
He created them godlike,
Reflecting God’s nature.
Genesis 1:27 (The Message)

I’ve heard this saying before:  “God doesn’t make crap.”  If you believe (like I do) the truth in that sentiment, then you have to follow your own logic and acknowledge that you are a special, made-with-a-purpose creation.

I daresay that living your life by that belief would bring untold joy to you and innumerable glories to God.  How much more would we be able to show love (to our neighbor and ourselves) if we considered all people to be God’s creation?

Wow.  Struck dumb by the words of a child.  My child.  Thank you, God, for blessing me with a glimpse of You in that sweet, unexpected conversation with my son.  Thank you for giving me a tangible example of a puzzling verse.

3 And he said: “Truly I tell you, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven.”
Matthew 18:3


  1. Debbie

    I can't wait to spend time with your kids. They are special and I always enjoy carrying on conversations with them.

    The above verse you quoted really is a wake up call to the “adults” in our culture. What are the qualities that children have? They are pure of heart. The simple things in life can keep them busy for hours. (ex: Aidan and her barbie doll decorations of the tree in your backyard…not a thing weird about it!) They are humble and excited about learning ….and it is our jobs as parents to make sure it is GODLY things they learn!!! Keep up the good work Nikki.


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